Dave took Seth for a father/son trip today.  They went to San Diego and are spending the night in Dave's parents condo.  They left at like 9:30 this morning so I had only one kid today and it was nice.  Lucy is a breeze on her own.  I don't think she screamed once today.  She was good while we did our running around this morning.  I had to get stuff for Seth's 5th birthday party (which is happening tomorrow).  The only time she got cranky was at lunch time, but once I told her we were going to get food, she was fine.  She kept pointing to all the restaurants we past and saying "yunch dere mama". 

It is always hard for me to sleep when Dave is gone.  I am a night owl anyway, and I go to bed later then he does most nights, but when he is not here, there is not a reason to go to bed...

I should sleep anyway, tomorrow is going to be crazy. But fun I hope.  I so want Seth to feel loved and special.  Birthdays are hard for me.  I have expectations of them that don't often happen, so I have stopped expecting them to be fun.  I am working on this.  I started being clearer with Dave about what I want, when I really want something.  I don't want that for Seth.  I want him to love his birthday (right now he does...he has been talking about this birthday since last birthday ended).  I know that we are not going to be able to do big elaborate parties every year, and I want him to be ok with that.  But I also want him to have fun every year, whether we do something big or not.  This year it is something big, cause he is going to be 5.